Ride on Space Cowgirl: The Work Annals

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Song of the Day

"If I Am" by Nine Days

So you're standin on the ledge
it looks like you might fall
its so far down
or maybe you were thinkin about jumpin
now you could have it all
if you learned a little patience
for though I cannot fly
I'm not content to crawl
so give me a little credit
have in me a little faith
I wanna be with you forever
if tomorrow's not too late
but its always too late when you got nothin
so you say
you should never let the sun set on tomorrow
before the sun rises today

If I am
another waste of everything you dreamed of
I will let you down
if I am
only here to watch you as you suffer
I will let you down

So you're walkin on the edge
and you wait your turn to fall
but you're so far gone
that you don't see the hands upheld to catch you
and you could find the fault
in the heart that you've been handed
for though you cannot fly
you're not content to crawl
and its always too late when you got nothin
so you say
but we should never let the sun set on tomorrow
before the sun rises

If I am
another waste of everything you hoped for
I will let you down
if I am
only here to watch you as you suffer
I will let you down

So you're standin on the ledge
it looks like you might fall

If I am
another waste of everything you dreamed of
I will let you down
if I am
only here to watch you as you suffer
I will let you down

The answers we find
are never what we had in mind
so we make it up as we go along
you don't talk of dreams
when i won't mention tomorrow
and we won't make those promises we can't keep

I will never leave you
I will not let you down
I will never leave you
I will not let you down

Monday, June 26, 2006

INFJ - The Idealist

As I was at a seminar for a company that places teachers in Japan, I took a personality profiler test so the company could get a feel for how I might act as an employee of their company. I was told that I am a good, strong candidate for the position, which is nice to hear, but ultimately, I cannot afford it as of yet. It is something I really want to do though.

Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging

Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists -- INFJs gravitate toward such a role -- are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.

INFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those who are in acute distress. INFJs may fantasize about getting revenge on those who victimize the defenseless. The concept of 'poetic justice' is appealing to the INFJ.

"There's something rotten in Denmark." Accurately suspicious about others' motives, INFJs are not easily led. These are the people that you can rarely fool any of the time. Though affable and sympathetic to most, INFJs are selective about their friends. Such a friendship is a symbiotic bond that transcends mere words.

INFJs have a knack for fluency in language and facility in communication. In addition, nonverbal sensitivity enables the INFJ to know and be known by others intimately.

Writing, counseling, public service and even politics are areas where INFJs frequently find their niche.

Functional Analysis:

Introverted iNtuition

Introverted intuitives, INFJs enjoy a greater clarity of perception of inner, unconscious processes than all but their INTJ cousins. Just as SP types commune with the object and "live in the here and now" of the physical world, INFJs readily grasp the hidden psychological stimuli behind the more observable dynamics of behavior and affect. Their amazing ability to deduce the inner workings of the mind, will and emotions of others gives INFJs their reputation as prophets and seers. Unlike the confining, routinizing nature of introverted sensing, introverted intuition frees this type to act insightfully and spontaneously as unique solutions arise on an event by event basis.

Extraverted Feeling

Extraverted feeling, the auxiliary deciding function, expresses a range of emotion and opinions of, for and about people. INFJs, like many other FJ types, find themselves caught between the desire to express their wealth of feelings and moral conclusions about the actions and attitudes of others, and the awareness of the consequences of unbridled candor. Some vent the attending emotions in private, to trusted allies. Such confidants are chosen with care, for INFJs are well aware of the treachery that can reside in the hearts of mortals. This particular combination of introverted intuition and extraverted feeling provides INFJs with the raw material from which perceptive counselors are shaped.

Introverted Thinking

The INFJ's thinking is introverted, turned toward the subject. Perhaps it is when the INFJ's thinking function is operative that he is most aloof. A comrade might surmise that such detachment signals a disillusionment, that she has also been found lacking by the sardonic eye of this one who plumbs the depths of the human spirit. Experience suggests that such distancing is merely an indication that the seer is hard at work and focusing energy into this less efficient tertiary function.

Extraverted Sensing

INFJs are twice blessed with clarity of vision, both internal and external. Just as they possess inner vision which is drawn to the forms of the unconscious, they also have external sensing perception which readily takes hold of worldly objects. Sensing, however, is the weakest of the INFJ's arsenal and the most vulnerable. INFJs, like their fellow intuitives, may be so absorbed in intuitive perceiving that they become oblivious to physical reality. The INFJ under stress may fall prey to various forms of immediate gratification. Awareness of extraverted sensing is probably the source of the "SP wannabe" side of INFJs. Many yearn to live spontaneously; it's not uncommon for INFJ actors to take on an SP (often ESTP) role.


Introverted iNtuiting Feeling Judging

INFJs are distinguished by both their complexity of character and the unusual range and depth of their talents. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally "doers" as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.

INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates." While instinctively courting the personal and organizational demands continually made upon them by others, at intervals INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out even their intimates. This apparent paradox is a necessary escape valve for them, providing both time to rebuild their depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which they are so susceptible as inherent "givers." As a pattern of behavior, it is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders, and hence the most often misunderstood -- particularly by those who have little experience with this rare type.

Due in part to the unique perspective produced by this alternation between detachment and involvement in the lives of the people around them, INFJs may well have the clearest insights of all the types into the motivations of others, for good and for evil. The most important contributing factor to this uncanny gift, however, are the empathic abilities often found in Fs, which seem to be especially heightened in the INFJ type (possibly by the dominance of the introverted N function).

This empathy can serve as a classic example of the two-edged nature of certain INFJ talents, as it can be strong enough to cause discomfort or pain in negative or stressful situations. More explicit inner conflicts are also not uncommon in INFJs; it is possible to speculate that the causes for some of these may lie in the specific combinations of preferences which define this complex type. For instance, there can sometimes be a "tug-of-war" between NF vision and idealism and the J practicality that urges compromise for the sake of achieving the highest priority goals. And the I and J combination, while perhaps enhancing self-awareness, may make it difficult for INFJs to articulate their deepest and most convoluted feelings.

Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the "inspirational" professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership. Psychology and counseling are other obvious choices, but overall, INFJs can be exceptionally difficult to pigeonhole by their career paths. Perhaps the best example of this occurs in the technical fields. Many INFJs perceive themselves at a disadvantage when dealing with the mystique and formality of "hard logic", and in academic terms this may cause a tendency to gravitate towards the liberal arts rather than the sciences. However, the significant minority of INFJs who do pursue studies and careers in the latter areas tend to be as successful as their T counterparts, as it is *iNtuition* -- the dominant function for the INFJ type -- which governs the ability to understand abstract theory and implement it creatively.

In their own way, INFJs are just as much "systems builders" as are INTJs; the difference lies in that most INFJ "systems" are founded on human beings and human values, rather than information and technology. Their systems may for these reasons be conceptually "blurrier" than analogous NT ones, harder to measure in strict numerical terms, and easier to take for granted -- yet it is these same underlying reasons which make the resulting contributions to society so vital and profound.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Drifting Toward Change

As hours fly and minutes disappear, I find that my time in paradise is slowly and, sometimes, quickly coming to an end. Right now I have two close friends that I practically do everything with. It's an interesting and fulfilling time for me. I'm making leaps in my quality of work, I'm actually living life on the island, and I'm even indulging myself in healthy amounts.

However, I find that my world of utter and complete happiness will soon change. I know that it's my choice to wake up in the morning and be happy, but at the same time, it's a little difficult to be happy when friends are scarce and the world that you've known is about to change.

I do plan on changing my life some. I plan on getting into the habit of running more. I plan to eat healthier and be happier. I plan to study deeper and love freer. I plan to read more books and maybe even draw some more. Heaven knows I've got plenty of "started" drawings and few completed ones. My life has tons of open roads and as such, I intend to rule out as few as possible. I do want to go to Japan though. I hope that after the end of this month, I'll have a clearer idea of which road I'd like to start journeying on.

Monday, June 19, 2006

A Day at Punchbowl

On a whim, I decided to accompany a friend of mine on a day of sightseeing in Honolulu. After a long bus trip, we arrived at the Punchbowl Cemetery in town, and enjoyed wandering around the grounds. Here are some pictures from our journey.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Due to Popular Demand

Well, it's not really popular demand, but I decided at work that I really need to flex my creative writing muscles some. It's been a while since I've done much beyond poetry. However, I've been inspired once again by my muse, the smashing return of *dum da da dum* Capt Caf!!!!

The title of today's episode is: Encounter with the Far East, or West depending on where you look at it.

Our heroine, Capt Caf has been on many brave journeys in her lifetime but none quite like this. Her alter ego, a mild mannered college student, was working on some research in between the hundreds of other things she managed to squeeze into her life. In the past few months, her close friend, Saru, made the step from student to life after being a student and left this realm. Burying herself in her alter ego's studies, Capt Caf's existence was becoming threatened. After a time, she began to reemerge. Her studies and research was still important, but she, Capt Caf, not the college student, came out more and more. She fought against the nebulous foe, Crampt Speece and won. She battled the burly and stupid Ife. She even managed to help many of her alter ego's friends defeat hunger and boredom.

Late nights of research and general super heroing let her to an opportunity to an opportunity that any superhero would tell you to not pass up. Her life had led her to cross another ocean once, and this opportunity afforded her the opportunity to cross yet another of the mighty water masses to arrive in a place unlike any she's visited. An RM was her mentor in this area of the world, and she knew before departing on her journey that she would be surrounded by people who would not be able to communicate well with her. Well, this chronologer isn't sure, but I don't think our beloved superhero encountered many, if any, foes in this land across another ocean. She's returning to her area surrounded by ahola for defense and is going about her normal, boredom and hunger fighting ways. This time, equipped with foreign things to offer.